Making love last has long been a topic of interest for everyone from causal daters to married couples and marriage psychologists. We know that over time couples can lose that initial spark that drew them together in the first place. Even the person that you couldn’t keep your hands off of in the beginning becomes less enticing over time.
Here are five small actions you can take to strengthen your relationship and the bond you have with your spouse:
1. Make coffee for your special someone.
Or translate this action into something that your partner would appreciate. If she doesn’t like coffee, make tea instead. Or, if tennis is his thing, make a point to watch a match with him each week. These small actions take cognitive effort and help you build a deeper connection with someone.
2. Porch sit.
In established relationships, so much of our communication happens over daily household tasks like doing the dishes or cooking dinner and it’s easy for that type of environment to dictate the type of conversation you have about daily minutia things such as paying bills or taking care of other life necessities. Although these conversations are important, they don’t contribute to a happier partnership. What does, however, is communication that allows each of you to get to know one another better.
3. Create a bucket list together.
Comedian Aziz Ansari wrote a book called “Modern Romance” in which he uncovered some important discoveries about modern relationships. He found several studies which concur that when couples participate in activities that are novel and exciting, they show an increase in relationship quality.
You may not be ready to bungee jump with your special someone just yet, but listing out what the two of you would like to experience together in the future is a fun way to create a shared vision for the future and learn more about each other.
4. Celebrate the milestone moments.
We go through life mostly checking off things on our to do list, solving problems, and dealing with mundane affairs, Too often we don’t celebrate our milestone moments, both big and small. However, it’s our milestone moments that make us the happiest and that keep us excited to keep pursuing our goals, ambitions, and dreams.